Re-learning old habits

I have been reading an excellent book by Richard Foster, simply called Prayer, and it has been a somewhat humbling experience, to say the least. I have been realizing as I turn each page that I can say, "I used to do that", but have slowly lost the habit...I can't even pinpoint exactly when, but gradually, in small everyday decisions to do some things and not others, priorities and habits shifted imperceptibly until, before I knew it, they were all backwards. When did I stop praying the ordinary while I worked? When did I limit my prayers to petitions, asking continually for things, instead of having prayer express my love, gratitude, praise, and listen for God's voice? What a fool am I to think that I need only come to God on behalf of others, when the truth of the matter is that if I am not filled with Him, anything I do "on behalf of others" is completely useless, because it is coming from ME, not from HIM!

"If then you are wise, you will show yourself rather as a reservoir than as a canal. For a canal spreads abroad water as it receives it, but a reservoir waits until it is filled before overflowing, and thus communicates, without loss to itself, its superabundant water. In the Church at the present day, we have many canals, few reservoirs."

~Bernard of Clairvaux (qtd. in Richard Foster, Prayer)

Teach me again, Holy Trinity, how to live in constant communion with You, to come to You to be filled with Your perfect Love, lest I try to pour out what I do not have! For only Your Love satisfies, heals, restores, and brings joy. Fill my cup to overflowing once again.

Summer is flying by...

It's hard to believe how quickly time goes by sometimes! While I was studying, investing in a long-distance relationship, keeping in touch with friends & family around the world, making new friends here in Binghamton, and trying to sleep, a whole term of Nursing School has flown by! Yeah, that's right, I'm already into Term II, which is CRAZY...but exciting, because now it means that we're moving out of the classroom and into practical experience. Finally!!!!

But I don't think that I would have made it this far with my sanity left were it not for two very important influences: God and Andrew. I know it sounds cheesy, and you can roll your eyes if you want, but it's true. Our God is so gracious in sustaining us even when we don't realize that He's doing it, and in teaching us even in the midst of our constant distractions. And He also provides us with one of His best gifts - His PEOPLE - to share in our joys and struggles, to encourage, support, convict, and sharpen us. There are countless people who fit this profile in my life, and if I were to name them all I would be here all day. But today's post is especially for Andrew, for his support and encouragement, for an unforgettable summer break spent together last week, and for calling me beautiful even after I flipped my kayak, fell in a river, and was soaked and muddy from head to toe. (Perhaps that's a story for the next post...) :)

Quotable quotes

From Lisa Reese, professor of our Nursing Assessment Techniques class, who is probably old enough to be my grandmother. When someone asked a question completely out of the blue about female examiners doing testicular exams (which has NOTHING to do with that day's lecture), her reply was:

"Oh, I'll tell you all about that when we get to the genitalia lecture, and probably more than you ever wanted to know. I love that nether-region down there! That's my favourite lecture to give - one year, I broke my leg, and I made them wheel me in here in a wheel chair to give it!"

It's going to be our last lecture of the year, and rumour has it we should tape-record it, because she's hilarious. I just hope there aren't too many demonstrations involved!

Back to school again!

Well, 2 weeks back into my return to school (for a 1-year accelerated BS in nursing), and I think I've finally got my groove back! :) Although hopefully I'll be able to stay away from some of the BAD study habits I used to have...like procrastination...So far so good.

One thing I'm still getting used to is that, by nature, Binghamton University is VERY different from Houghton College! Its size makes all the administrative, paperwork-type stuff that we have to do a lot less personal and more of a hassle, and running around on a wild goose chase takes a lot longer because of the size of campus...But the good things are location (lots of things to do in our spare time...oh, wait, we don't have any spare time!), and diversity. I have classmates from all over the world - Russia, Ghana, Kenya, China, Japan, Vietnam, Israel...it's so cool!

So far, the content hasn't been that difficult or new, but the hardest part is the pace of the course. Since it's a unique, intensive program, designed for people who are switching into the field and already have a bachelor's degree or higher in another field, we already have a lot of our academics out of the way, so we need to cram all the nursing-specific stuff PLUS all our clinical hours into 12 months. We haven't started clinicals yet, but once we do, THAT is going to be the real doozy. Hooray for living in scrubs starting in July! :)

I'm sure I'll have all sorts of interesting stories once I start clinicals! But for now we're just talking about really fun stuff in class. For example, today we had a whole lecture on bowel disorders and stool. (Yes, for all you lay people, it was about poop!)

Our first exam is out of the way, and I was surprised at how well I did - but I'm not getting too confident, because next week we have 3 midterms, so we'll see if I'm still smiling after that! In the meantime, though, we have 2 weeks down and 3 to go in Summer Term I, then a wonderful week off for the 4th of July...I hope these next 3 weeks fly by as quickly as the last 2 did! I'll keep you posted on any fun stories. :)

Let us flee to the Eucharist

One of the books I'm reading right now is The Seven Storey Mountain, the autobiography of Thomas Merton, and I stumbled across this passage the other day. It really made me think about how much of a difference it would make if I were to surround myself with religious symbols, with things that would point me to God when I saw them. In his description, Merton is talking about a small French town where he lived as a child, in which the layout and architecture of the whole city was constructed so that all roads led to the church, and no matter where you were in town you could see it. How amazing it would be if the Church was truly the centre of society again!

Oh, what a thing it is, to live in a place that is so constructed that you are forced, in spite of yourself, to be at least a virtual contemplative! Where all day long your eyes must turn, again and again, to the House that hides the Sacramental Christ!

I did not even know who Christ was, that He was God. I had not the faintest idea that there existed such a thing as the Blessed Sacrament. I thought churches were simply places where people got together and sang a few hymns. And yet now I tell you, you who are now what I once was, unbelievers, it is that Sacrament, and that alone, the Christ living in our midst, and sacrificed by us, and for us and with us, in the clean and perpetual Sacrifice, it is He alone Who holds our world together, and keeps us all from being poured headlong and immediately into the pit of our eternal destruction. And I tell you there is a power that goes forth from that Sacrament, a power of light and truth, even into the hearts of those who have heard nothing of Him and seem to be incapable of belief.

Amen and Amen!