The story of a cell phone

Did you know that moisture is the worst enemy of cell phones? Well, I learned this week that it doesn't even take direct exposure to water, like a dunking or a spraying or an "I dropped it in the toilet." (Hilariously, that is the most common cause of cell phone replacement!) No, my friends, it takes less than direct wetness to make the little moisture-detecting sticker on the inside of the phone turn red. All it takes is humidity - in my case, sitting overnight in the pocket of a pair of pants that I had put on over my wet swimsuit. Not the brightest idea, I'll admit, but it wasn't that I thought it was a good idea, I just wasn't thinking!

So after panicking because it WAS my fault that it now wouldn't turn on, I spent several hours researching online what to DO about it, and I found some pretty interesting stuff to say the least. I definitely ignored the advice to bake it in my oven at 125 degrees to dry it out, but I DID take it apart as much as I could and put it out in my car with the windows rolled up for the afternoon, then overnight in a plastic bag surrounded by packs of silica gel (you know, that stuff that comes in vitamin bottles and new shoes that says "Do not eat!" - it's a moisture-absorber). And I prayed hard as I put it back together again, then plugged it in to the charger.

Guess what! IT TURNED ON!!! :) And now it works perfectly. HALLELUJAH!

Now, if only my car would cooperate just like that...

Oh, what a night...

So, in the past few weeks, I have both loved and hated not having a job. Sometimes I get tired of having all my time be free time, not having any structure. But in the end, I have been able to...

1. Take my brother Ben out driving, out for a college visit at Houghton, and climbing around the waterfalls in Wiscoy Creek.
2. Visiting the Davises in Hollidaysburg, PA, where I got to speak Portuguese, catch up with them, and get networked with some of their church friends who are physical therapists.
3. Have enough energy and time to be a housekeeper and cook in my own house.
4. Starting to learn how to play the guitar, thanks to the Shaffners' wonderful long-term loan of one of their guitars. (And I'm glad that nobody else is around to hear me yet, 'cause I'm really self-conscious, and I want to make sure I'm confident enough to not make a fool of myself in front of anyone!)
5. Picking strawberries and making a strawberry-rhubarb pie, (which was devoured at the pizza party we had at Paul & Katrina's, at which we made 7 homemade pizzas plus breadsticks and salad...for 12 people...).
6. Having enough time to guiltlessly read and thoroughly enjoy Out of the Silent Planet and Perelandra, by C.S. Lewis, I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings, by Maya Angelou, Prophetic Untimeliness, by Os Guinness, and One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich, by Alexander Solzhenitsyn.
7. Successfully changing a flat tire on my car with Amy, at midnight, wearing skirts, on our way home from Buffalo on Monday night, all by ourselves. (Yeah! Go us!!!)
8. Having the freedom to say yes when my youth pastor asked if I wanted to fill in as a chaperone on the Cuba Youth missions trip to Lexington, Kentucky, in two weeks, because one of their original ones had to cancel.
9. Watching Brazil be eliminated, and then Portugal be eliminated, and then finally Italy win, the World Cup!!!!!
10. Being able to spend time with Amy, Sam, Paul & Katrina before they all leave the country again for their new and exciting lives in China, Thailand, and Tanzania!

But I don't want to have to say goodbye...not yet...

It's a wonder I still have fingernails left!

Wow. Except for the Germany vs. Sweden game, that was a blow-out in favour of the hosts, all the other games so far in the Round of 16 have been INTENSE! The classic Latin American duel between Argentina and Mexico went into overtime before Argentina pulled off the win, England vs. Ecuador was only 1-0 in favour of the Brits after a lot of sweat, and in a very physical game that ended with only 18 players on the field, Portugal beat the Netherlands in 100 minutes of regular time play.

(Yes, a normal game is 90 minutes long. That means that there were a total of 10 minutes added onto the game, because of the number of injuries, fights, and cards issued - a total of 16 yellow cards, with 2 players from each team ending up with reds.) CRAZY!!!!! I was shocked by how high their tempers were running! And yet, maybe I shouldn't be surprised, because, after all, it's a knock-out game, and winning literally means the world to every single team at this point. (Or at least until their next chance, 4 years from now.) But, unlike most of the commentators and analysts who have been tearing apart the ref's job, I think that the vast majority of those cards were deserved. Some of those players were out to kill, or at least it seemed so, and, especially on the Dutch team, they just lost all sense of sportsmanship. It was clear that they weren't going to give Portugal any room to play unless the ref absolutely made them, not even respecting the traditional unwritten rules of Fair Play football chivalry. For example, when a player on Portugal's team was laying on the ground injured, and the ref stopped play for him to receive medical attention, the custom would be for the ref to give the ball back to the Dutch team, who out of courtesy would play it back to the Portuguese defense so they could start the play over to make up for the injury. But the Netherlands were behind, and they wanted to tie it up, and courtesy apparently would get in the way of a potential victory, so instead of returning the ball to Portugal, the Dutch captain just kept the ball and launched it straight into an attack on goal. GRRRRR!!!! That made me madder than almost anything else that whole game. After that, I don't think I could have been content with Holland moving on. Even though either one will probably lose to England in the quarter-finals, anyways... :)

But, for me, the biggest nail-biter is yet to come, when Brazil plays Ghana on Tuesday. That will be a sad day for me, because regardless of who wins and loses, I will be sad no matter what. Those are the two teams that I most want to see succeed, and so to see them pitted against each other this early on is just too bad...Granted, I want Brazil to win the World Cup, and in order to do that they would have to beat Ghana. But of all the teams that are left, Ghana is the only other team who I could whole-heartedly cheer for if Brazil were eliminated. (Sorry for all of you who are cheering for Africa...you know I'd join you if it weren't for Brazil!)

And, Hiram, to answer your question (see comment on previous post), yes, we made it to our 32 minutes, but just barely...Japan scored after 33 minutes. Hooray! A new record by a whole minute! :) I was a bit scared at first during that game, because Japan scored first and we weren't looking too good, but then the boys shaped up and played some darn good football in the second half. Not to mention that they put in my favourite goalkeeper, Rogerio Ceni!!!!!!! For some reason which I don't understand, he is only the back-up goalie for Brazil this World Cup, even though I think he's way better than the starter, Dida. (Come on, how can you NOT love a goalie who not only blocks goals, but also makes them for his team? And he's really good at it, too, being the free-kick-scoring-est goalie in the world, and also scoring on PK's.) But, of course, I'm not biased at all. :)

May the best team win! And I promise to post on something not related to the World Cup soon. :)

The zebras are running loose!

That's right - a zebra is what we Brazilians call an upset. Something that nobody expected, a result that according to all reason wasn't supposed to happen but did anyways. And in a cup that until now had been fairly lacking in zebras, we now have a BIG one...

GHANA BEAT THE CZECH REPUBLIC!!!! Yes, that's right, the World Cup rookies came up big against the team that was ranked 2nd in the world coming into this Cup, in a b-e-a-utiful 2-0 win. Once again, the goalie played a HUGE part in the result, as Ghana's Richard Kingston moved into the lead with the most total saves so far this Cup. Chris Casali, who has "GHANA" painted in big letters on the rear windshield of his car, can now throw the party he's been waiting for, and Hiram is probably dancing a gleeful jig in Afghanistan at this good news! I hope that Ghana is the Zebra in this World Cup, just like Senegal was in the last one...or maybe even better. How awesome would it be if they, a rookie team from a small country in Africa, made it all the way to the finals?!?!?!?! :)

To make things even more interesting, in that same group, the U.S. pulled a very zebra-like tie with 3-time champs Italy, leaving their Group E still completely wide open, with none of the 4 teams yet guaranteed a spot in the next round, but also none of them eliminated yet.

And the other huge zebra is that France, the champions in 1998, have only managed 2 ties in a group where all the other teams have very little World Cup experience, and they face the possibility of being knocked out unless they shape up and put together a win against Togo on Friday!

Some things, however, have turned out as expected. The 4 teams favoured to win are already through to the round of 16. Argentina's offense is in the lead, with 7 goals scored and a guaranteed spot in the next round. The host Germany has also secured their spot, as well as being the team with the most shots on goal so far. England is also moving on, with 2 VERY hard-earned victories in close games against Paraguay and Trinidad-Tobago. And Brazil is also undefeated, moving on to the round of 16 regardless of the result of Thursday's match against Japan, and only 32 minutes away from breaking their own record of defensive consistency. If they reach 32 minutes of play without Japan scoring on them, they will have 459 sequential shut-out minutes played in World Cup matches. The most ever! After a disappointing first-round elimination last time around, Portugal has made it to the next round this time with some breathing room. And Ecuador, the only team to defeat Brazil in the World Cup qualifying games, is also undefeated and moving on, regardless of the outcome of tomorrow's duel with Germany.

But, in spite of all the results in favour of the traditional teams, the playing field is still wide open. You never know what might happen. And I have a feeling there are still plenty of zebras in store! :)

It isn't over 'til it's over...

For all of you who haven’t been following the World Cup, I have a few words for you: WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR? You’ve missed a great time. But don’t worry, it’s not too late to join the fun! We just finished the first of three rounds of group-stage play, which decides who goes through to the elimination rounds that start on the 24th. And, while we still have a long way to go until the finals on June 9th, there has already been enough excitement to keep even the most detached of non-soccer-fans on their toes!

You see, the beautiful thing about soccer is that every team has a shot. There is no team that is guaranteed to win any match, and no team that can be dismissed altogether. Sure, there are favourites, teams with World Cup tradition, with big-name stars, with high expectations. But the best play doesn’t always come from the people of whom we expect greatness, but rather from the most unexpected places. And so far, the only big team that hasn’t disappointed has been Germany, although for a team touted for their defense, they didn’t get the win easily, with Costa Rica putting in goals. England won, but barely. Brazil won, but barely. Portugal won, but barely. Argentina sweat to beat first-timers Cote d’Ivoire. France barely managed a sleepy, scoreless tie with Switzerland. Trinidad and Tobago, in its first-ever World Cup appearance, proudly holding the record of being the smallest country ever to play in the World Cup, brilliantly held the Swedes to a scoreless tie, even being down one player for most of the second half. You may ask, “90 minutes of play and nobody scored? Wouldn’t that be boring?” And my resounding reply is, “NO WAY!” It was one of the most intense, nail-biting, phenomenally-played games so far. Probably tied in my book with yesterday’s Tunisia vs. Saudi Arabia game for best-games-to-watch-so-far. (Yes, even more favourite than the opening victory of my heart-team, Brazil, 1-0 over Croatia.) Tunisia and Saudi Arabia ended in a 2-2 tie, but it went right down to the wire, with Tunisia scoring the tying goal in stoppage time. (For those of you who don’t know, those are the minutes the ref adds onto the game after the official 90 minutes are up.) Just goes to show that it isn’t over ‘till it’s over! J

And, although of course I am biased, some of the best stories so far belong to the world’s goalkeepers. Take, for example, the Mexican goalie, Oswaldo Sanchez, whose team didn’t think he was going to make it to the opening game against Iran because he had gone back to Mexico just a week earlier when his father unexpectedly passed away. But, even though nobody would have questioned him at all for missing the first game, or even the entire World Cup, for not having the emotional energy to play, he flew in and suited up for his team. When the teams shook hands before the kick-off, the Iranian team gave Sanchez flowers. And he played an excellent game to help his team to a 3-1 victory over Iran. It was impossible not to cry when the game ended and the entire team piled on top of a crying Sanchez, hugged him, kissed his head, and celebrated by crying with him.

And then there’s Shaka Hislop, the backup goalie for the Trinidad & Tobago team, who was called off the bench just minutes before the opener when the starting goalie got hurt in warm-ups. And he played the game of his life! He made one unbelievable save after another, and was a veritable brick wall for his team. All without having the mental preparation of being able to anticipate the game and plan for it. Or Tunisia’s goalkeeper, who at the age of 40 is the oldest player in the World Cup and was one of the reasons they stayed tied with Saudi Arabia.

I LOVE THIS GAME!!! Who is YOUR favourite team so far?

Finally!

I must have really bad timing, because every time I've tried to post something on my blog in the past week, the Blogspot site tells me something like, "Sorry, we're overloaded right now, try back later!" Or, "Blogger is undergoing maintenance." And then, when I checked back later, it gave me some similar message. But apparently other Bloggers have been able to update just fine! I must have really bad timing...Grrrrr...

I also hate technology because, for some reason, my phone is doing the same thing that Michelle's was doing a little while ago, and showing absolutely nothing on the screen. So while all the mechanisms still function normally for taking calls and making them, the problem is that I can't see what I'm DOING! Which means I can't see who's calling me, what time it is (this is very important since I don't have a watch...), or find anyone's number inside my phone! (Which of course aren't written down anywhere as a backup.) Grrrr again...

But in other, happier news, Amy & I have moved into a new apartment, just for the summer, and while I HATE moving (with the fire of a thousand burning suns), it WAS wonderful to discover that our new place comes with cable TV and high-speed internet included! SWEETNESS!!!!!

And, after tomorrow, my job is only half-time for a while, giving me the afternoons off! Perfect for spending the entire day...

WATCHING THE WORLD CUP!!!!!!!!!

That's right, people, the World Cup starts today! (Bet you can't guess who I'm cheering for...) :)

At long last...

It's hard to believe that my dearest friend Katrina is finally, after lots of waiting and time apart, married to Paul! But it really happened, even though I wasn't there to see it, and now they are one...Isn't she beautiful? And just look at the grins on their faces...Ah, to be young and in love! :)

(Edit: Oh, and many thanks to Chuck for the beautiful picture...)

Hooray for reunions!

It is so surreal to be reunited with the friends who are closest to my heart, after a year of being apart and trying to keep up with each other via e-mails, letters, blogs, and the occasional phone call...It seems so right, so normal, and at the same time so much has happened in the past year in our own separate lives that we all feel like very different people. And I guess we are! VERY different. Some married, some getting married, some gone to the other side of the world and back again, most with our futures still wide open, all trusting in God's hand to guide us and shape us even though we may have no clue where He's taking us or what He's making us into... But you know what? That's the beauty of friendship, of the Body of Christ - that it changes with us as we change, so that it is just as comfortable now as it was at the beginning and will be in the future, and it will feel just as right to be reunited them - with YOU - when we're all wearing our grey hair with pride as it does now, when we have most of our lives still ahead of us. :)

Somehow, I find myself with not nearly enough pictures in digital format...I'll have to fix that this weekend. :) I LOVE MY FRIENDS!

Apology...

I'm sorry! I know that I've been pretty absent recently...that most of my posts recently have been fairly sporadic, short, inane, and not very informative as to how I'm doing...That I haven't been responding to questions in your comments...And I want you to know that it's not because nothing's going on, or because I don't care enough to share more than just superficial anecdotes about my life, or because I'm ignoring you! There has been so much going on that I would love to share, discuss, ask, vent, and celebrate with you! Like reunions with friends and family, great books I've read and movies I've watched, progress that has been made with some of the kids in my youth group, and the curious mixture of excitement and fear at the prospect of making decisions about my future...But it has been impossible to sit down at a computer and type these things out for, oh, the last month or so! They have just been piling up in my mind and heart, and sometimes on the pages of my journal or in heart-to-heart conversations with friends, but never on the screen of my computer...Alas, the problem with having internet access only at work! That means that the only way for me to do anything online for my own benefit is either during work time, or if I stay late...And in my 8-hour work days, I have recently had at least 9 hours' worth of work to do. (For example, yesterday, my full work day was answering phones, managing the fleet, getting financial records ironed out for the end of the fiscal year, organizing end-of-the-schoolyear academic stuff for all the profs in my department, and working on contracts for all our home games next year. But in the middle of it all, the sound guy didn't show up for the opening ceremony of a big conference we had up here in the gym, so I ended up setting up the whole sound system! Woohoo! All those months of setting up the Godspeed sound system really paid off! In fact, to make things easier, it actually WAS the Godspeed sound system that I set up...) So, the writing while at work option is definitely out the window, and, inevitably, if I stay late, someone sees that I'm in my office and drops in to ask a question, or to give me more work to do...SO, here I am, apologizing profusely for being gone, and yet still not saying anything useful...go figure...

But the exciting part is that I get to see almost all of you in the next week! Hooray for weddings! :) I can't wait to see you all...

Ode to a brother

Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiirthday, dear BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN,
Happy Birthday to youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!!!!

On this day, 17 years ago, I remember when...(OK, fine, I'll spare you from the embarrassing, sentimental stories.)

Aah, how is it that he's 17 today? Time flies way too fast...
Love you, birthday boy!

WOOHOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Houghton College is going to have its first woman President!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yeah, baby, that's right, Karl Eastlack just announced it in Chapel today, that Dr. Shirley Mullen has reconsidered and accepted the position!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (There simply aren't enough exclamation marks for this one!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) You should have heard the thunderous applause and the cheering...I don't think any other candidate could have even come close to the amount of support she had.

It's so unbelievably exciting!!!!!!!!!!!! What a relief! What a victory! In fact, I danced a little jig and gave many high-fives and am still wearing a big grin on my face because of it all, and I think that will still be true for several days. Yes, the feminist in me is overjoyed because she's a woman, and we need more women in leadership at this school and in the Church. Because in a community where, although many verbally preach egalitarianism (with some criticism), the actual practice is for some reason frowned upon (or at least kept under wraps so as not to make people think we are too liberal), we will now have a woman in the seat of highest honour and responsibility. With overwhelming support. Yes, the feminist in me is overjoyed and thrilled and delighted! But I'm also excited because, regardless of gender, I think she was the most qualified, the most capable candidate, and the one with the best and clearest vision, accompanied by the most open-mindedness and listening ears.

WOOHOO!!!!!!!!!! :)

Why do car accidents always seem to happen in parking lots?

The two times that my car has been damaged since she has been in my possession have both been in parking lots. The first one was in the church parking lot, a late night after choir practice, dark & snowy...a small dent, no big deal. Friday, though, it was in broad daylight and a slightly bigger deal! As I was idling, waiting for a pump to open up at the gas station, a girl who had just gotten off her shift tending the cash register was completely oblivious to the world around her as she backed out of her parking spot directly into my rear driver's side door...Hard. Apparently, she was in the middle of a fight with her boyfriend as she was pulling out, which explains the distraction, but still doesn't fix my door...Argh, I hate having to deal with this stuff!

My poor Talullah...all beat-up... :(

Microsoft Paint

For those of you who thought Microsoft Paint was one of those computer accessories that just took up space and had no useful purpose, I have news for you: I used Paint yesterday and today to do stuff for work! I edited some graphics that our ridiculous version of Photoshop was doing a really bad job editing, so I just pasted them into Paint, zoomed in really close, and made the corrections I needed to make! Now, if only I could come up with a use for Microsoft Notebook...

Do you know what LavaLife is?

Well, neither did I, until yesterday. Sheri (my boss) and I were working on reconciling all the statements for the department's credit cards for the past month, and there was a charge on it that we had no record of ever making. It was from a place called LavaLife, and so I googled it, and it confirmed our suspicions that it's definitely not a purchase anyone here in the gym would have made. (At least I hope not...because it turns out it's an online DATING SERVICE!!!!) We laughed and laughed and laughed, until several people (including Bill Swanson and Matt Webb) jokingly 'fessed up, which made us laugh more because everyone in the Athletic Department is married except myself and 2 other women! (And, no, we're not that desperate. If I ever use a "meet other singles" service of any kind, you have every right to drag me out into the street and shoot me!) So someone's personal life is more exciting now, thanks to Houghton College. Of all things to steal someone's credit card number for...

Today is a good day

Why?

1. Jesus Christ is risen! He is risen, indeed!!!!!!!!!
2. The sun is shining, it is warm, and the daffodils are blooming in my front yard
3. Rachel called this morning! From Japan!!!! What a wonderful way to start the day. :)
4. I am drinking coffee right now...ah, how I have missed it...
5. Our Easter cantata went off without a hitch yesterday, and there were 8 people who responded to the altar call after Pastor Jon's message, one of whom has already expressed interest in baptism! (She has apparently been seeking out who Christ is for several months now, and has finally decided it's time to jump in and start following in His footsteps.)
6. I spent all day yesterday with a group of wonderful people from my church, including a missionary family on furlough from RVA, and many very cute children with whom I jumped for hours on the trampoline (my legs still feel like Jell-O...) and went on an Easter egg hunt and roasted Peeps over a bonfire.
7. Pastor Jon gets points for culinary creativity this weekend - he decided to try something new with the ham for Easter dinner this year, and so he deep-fried it. The whole pork shoulder, so there was sort of a crust that formed on the outside, and the ham on the inside came out really tender, and actually really good! (But far too much work, he said...) Somehow, I just find a deep-fried ham really amusing, in a bizarre sort of way.
7. Did I mention that the sun is shining?


P.S. - Did you know that, in 1953, it took 27 hours to create one Marshmallow Peep, but today, it takes six minutes? Well, now you know. :)

On this Thursday of bread and wine, of towel and water...

Prepare the way of the Lord, the prophets cried. But even they can’t have been fully prepared for a Saviour who washed the feet of those who would follow in his footsteps, or a God whose star-flinging hands were splintered on a wooden cross.

Bread of heaven – it sticks in the throat. An immeasurable, unquantifiable Creator willingly brought down to Earth like manna and reduced to the status of a metaphor; something to be shared, broken, eaten.

And, in the same way, his very essence distilled into a full-bodied cup of wine, albeit wine for a wedding, the best vintage, saved to the last and drunk at the death.

Take, eat. This is my body.

Take, drink. This is my blood.

Feed on me. And I will turn your world upside down and inside out. Not in the way a genie out of a bottle might do it. Not in the way the rulers of this world do it. Not in the way you may expect.

As Paul wrote to the Corinthians, ‘human strength can’t begin to compete with God’s “weakness”.’ Simple. Foolish. Ungodly?

What a way to go.

~Brian Draper, London Institute for Contemporary Christianity

Just thinking of the bread and wine of which we will partake tonight makes everything catch in my throat. Just thinking of my Lord wrapping a towel around His waist to wash the feet of those who would fall asleep as He prayed, who would deny they knew Him, who would betray His trust, I weep, because I know that that is me. That I would be like Peter and say, "Lord, it is I who should be washing Your feet - please, let me take the towel. I am filthy, inside and out. You are the Messiah, the Son of God! It is I who should be on the floor at Your feet." And yet He gently insisted, "This is the full extent of my love. This is how my Kingdom works - you must let me do this for you, let me become your servant, your sustenance, your life." How humble Your love, O God!

A weekend to rest

After a wonderful, phenomenal visit with Uncle Mike and Jeremy on Friday (during which there was muchexchanging of news, reminiscing, laughter, and of course the good 0l' Brazilian hug-and-kiss-on-the-cheek combo), I was ambushed by Katrina and Paul, who were headed off to Paul's house in PA for break. Their mission: to convince me to go with them for the weekend. My "I really shouldn't go" excuse (besides having to pay for gas...): the girls in my youth group would absolutely KILL me if I didn't come to see them perform in Beauty and the Beast on Friday night, after Kat & Paul were leaving. I couldn't miss the play, but I didn't want to have to drive down by myself late at night, paying for all of the gas. But with the promise of a hot tub, home-cooked food, and acres of trees to climb, with a comfortable bed to sleep in at the end of the day, it didn't take them very long to change my mind! I know, I'm a pushover when it comes to hot tubs and food and someone to split gas with...Throw in a little music and some books, and I'm REALLY a pushover! :)

So I went to Beauty and the Beast (which was really well done - the costumes, the sets, the music - probably the best high school drama production I've seen in a long time), and then proceeded to make the drive to Rockton, with Paul Christensen to split the cost of gas and keep me awake. Pulling in at midnight, exhausted and sore, the perfect end to the night was a soak in the Shaffners' hot tub! Wonderful...followed by Saturday, a day of firsts for me: my first time shooting a gun (Paul's own .357 Magnum revolver...it was awesome!!!! Even though I have terrible aim...), my first time buying an article of clothing from Goodwill without trying it on, first time going off-roading through mud and over rocks & logs (in the Shaffners' sweet Jeep, with Paul driving and Kat & I hanging out the back), and my first time seeing a Civil War mortar cannon being fired! Among many, many other incredible things...like apple pancakes for breakfast, and an amazing roast for dinner...like a trip to the library, where they were having a book sale where Kat & I bought 12 books for 90 cents...like the freedom to climb a tree or curl up with a book or take a nap in the middle of the afternoon or do whatever I felt like doing...like talking about The Screwtape Letters in Mr. Shaffner's Sunday school class...In short, it was wonderful. Pictures to come soon! :)

I think my favourite part about this weekend, though, was being blown away by how, with my own parents so far away that I can't run to them when I need a safe place, God has graciously provided me with surrogate families when I need them. Like Uncle Mike, who listened to my rambling because he cares, who offered hugs and prayers and encouragement. Like the Shaffners, who not only opened up their home for a weekend of rest, but also offered me their spare bedroom upstairs if I ever need a place to live or even just to crash for a little while. I left their house at 5:30 Monday morning with tears of gratitude in my eyes, for their generosity, their kindness, their open hearts, wise words, and the love of Christ that they poured out on me this weekend. I didn't realize until after I left how much I had needed that! Thank You, God, for Your body. And thank you, Paul & Kat, for sharing your family with me.

When worlds collide

Wow. Jeremy Davis just walked by the door to my office on his wandering tour of the gym, and I jumped up, threw open my office door, and gave him one of the biggest hugs ever! You see, I've never seen him in this country before. And now he's in HOUGHTON!!!! I've known him ever since he was born, in Brazil, into one of the most amazing families in my mission, just 10 months after my brother Ben was born. And now he's visiting colleges!!!! Unbelievable. He's one of my little brother Ben's best friends (one of the "Three Stooges," as I affectionately call Ben, Jer, and Caleb, who have been practically inseparable since birth), and a REALLY quality 15-year-old guy. Jer, you're awesome!

And since he can't drive yet, that also means that his dad, Uncle Mike, is here on campus, with not that much to do while Jeremy's doing his stuff. So I get to see, and talk to, and laugh with, one of my favourite "uncles!" He can play virtually every musical instrument known to humanity, and if he's never seen it or played it before, just give him a couple minutes with it and he'll be a pro. And he's a great preacher - although, come to think of it, I've never heard him preach in English before... :) I can't wait to hear how he's doing, how the whole Davis family is doing, to catch up on news and life from back home. And to get an Uncle Mike hug. Oh, how I miss his belly laugh!

I'm so excited, I can't stop grinning! Wow. God is so amazing.

Remember that dream?

The one in which I dreamed that it snowed?

Well, it came true. I woke up this morning to snow. And it's falling from the sky again. What happened to spring?

Life doesn't have to be exciting to be good

A few weeks ago in youth group, we talked about whether or not we can know what we really need, or whether our wants and our needs are so entangled that we don't know which is which, and we have no way of knowing what is ultimately best for ourselves, but only God does. As part of the exercise, we took a sort of genie-in-the-lamp quiz. Pastor Don made a list of about 20 things, and then we had each person take 5 minutes to read over and think about the list, then circle the 3 things they would ask God to do for them that they thought would make them truly happy. The options ranged from "having a car" to "if people liked/respected me" and "if my parents/family would just stop fighting all the time." And you know what the most popular option was? "Moving away from Cuba!" [edit: for those of you who, like Tegan, are confused, this is Cuba, NY we're talking about... ;)] It is truly amazing how many of them thought they would find happiness if they could just get out of their rinky-dink old town to a more exciting place! Like New York, or Hawaii, or Hollywood. Or, in some cases, Olean...("Anything is better than Cuba," says Amanda.) "But what makes you think that you'll be happy in New York, Stacy?" "Well, there's so much more to do there, more people...I dunno, it's just more exciting." "OK, I'll give you that...but do you need excitement in order to be happy? What happens when New York gets boring? When you've seen all the sights, shopped in all the stores, gotten tired of the pollution and the traffic jams?" They didn't really know what to do with that. And frankly, sometimes I don't either. But if what I want is always something more than I have now, something different, then I'll be waiting around forever for happiness to fall into my lap, for the perfect conditions, for the next exciting thing because what I have now just isn't as good as I think it could be.

I'm not trying to say that excitement is a bad thing. Sometimes we do need to get away. Sometimes a change of scenery, a change of pace, gives us a kick in the pants, and sometimes that's what we need. But if we continually "need" those kicks in the butt, shouldn't that indicate to us that something is wrong? Do we really need exciting vacations in an exotic tropical paradise to "rekindle" marriages? How about bringing love into everyday life instead of escaping to find it, as though everyday life is somehow bent on destroying romance? And why do we do the same thing with our faith, as though the only time when our relationship with God can really thrive is when we are on a spiritual retreat, or in our spiritual alone time delving into Scripture? I love my daily quiet times, set apart for prayer and reading and worship, but I have found recently that perhaps I idolize them too much. Because if I somehow see those as my only moments of prayer and worship throughout the day, and spend my whole day counting down to those hours, then I have missed all the other hours in which I could have been praying and worshiping as I worked, as I ate lunch, as I answered the phone...Why does the word "routine" always seem to have negative connotations, meaning dreary monotony and drudgery? As though somehow it's a bad thing to allow oneself to "slip into" a routine? Granted, if the pattern becomes thoughtless, stuck in a rut, following a routine simply because that's what you do and have always done, then that quickly becomes complacency, and I flee from that as fast as I can! But if I constantly need to change things in order to avoid the rut, if I need boosts of excitement to keep me interested in anything, if I look forward for my fulfillment, will I ever learn how to be content right here where I am? To pray in the circumstances I've been given? To love the people who are around me instead of looking for more exciting or more respectful or more intellectual people to befriend?

There is something strangely fulfilling about routine. Something extremely good about small, mundane tasks, like vacuuming up dead ladybugs from our living room carpet, or kneading bread dough, or stuffing hundreds of envelopes with support request letters. There is something deeply stabilizing about becoming familiar with Scriptures, with the prayers of the church, to the point where they become ingrained in my very being. I love rolling out of bed and watching the sun rise, starting the day by breathing a prayer of thanksgiving, "Thank You, Lord for this day that you have made! It is good, because You have declared that it is good, and I will rejoice and be glad in it." And I don't have to move somewhere exciting or have a different job to rejoice - there are no conditions. Oh, that someday prayer, communion with God, will be a habit for me! One that will not be easily broken! That prayer would be as natural to me sitting here at my desk at work as it would be in my "prayer closet" or in a church service or laughing over how stupid I look trying to keep up with Cari in DDR. I so desperately want Amanda and Stacy and Cari and Lindsay and Jenn and LeighAnn and Jessica and Crystal to seek the fulfillment they crave in the place where they will find it - in Christ - and not in the constant quest for the next best thing. He IS the best thing - the greatest taste, the richest of fare, the Living Water, the Bread of Life! I want God to bring significance to their everyday lives, not just the times when they feel spiritually excited about Him.

I had a terrible, horrible dream last night

You see, it was one of those dreams in which you dream about waking up and getting ready for the day and doing everything you would usually do after really waking up. Except this time, when I opemed the curtains in my kitchen to let the sunshine in while I ate breakfast, I looked out onto a yard covered in SNOW! A whole foot of it, freshly fallen that night, with freezing winds and everything. Needless to say, I panicked, because in real life, for the past few days we have finally been having the most GORGEOUS spring weather here in Houghton - sunshine, warmth, blue skies, the whole deal. But with it still being March, there is still that teeny-tiny voice that says, "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched - winter may come back again..." My dream came from that voice. And when I opened the curtains to see another beautiful sunshiny day, with no snow, I defiantly mentally squashed the source of that evil little voice, and proceeded to wear sandals to work as a step of faith in the permanence of spring! Please stay, beautiful spring weather!

Things that make me smile...

• The sun shining outside!
• The uber-cold, tasty water I'm drinking right now (How is water tasty? Well, it's quite simple, really. It doesn't taste like minerals, or iron, or sulfur, or pipes, or refrigerator - just like water!)
• Music
• Backrubs
  
• Books (especially those which are read for fun!)
  
• Earl Grey tea with milk and raw sugar
  
• Being tickled by the whiskers of a hamster named Shelby
• Sharing my house with Amy and Katrina (and Paul, too)
• Gilmore Girls marathons
• Extra-super-duper-dark chocolate
• God's unfailing love
  
• This... :)Together again, at last! Never to say goodbye again!
• You, and the fact that you are here, reading this blog :)
  

Juror #16

Once upon a time, there was a girl named Becca, who was learning how to make it in the adult world. With her own car, her own job, her own house to pay rent on, her own bills, there was only one thing missing in order for her to be considered a full grown-up: jury duty. That's right, ladies and gentlemen, I have now joined the ranks of those responsible (*cough*) adult citizens of this country who have been called upon for this duty and privilege. Today I sat in the Allegany County Courthouse all morning with 49 other lucky people, watching a video on the importance of the jury in the American judicial system, being introduced to the case and all of the procedures of the court, and keeping our fingers crossed that our number wouldn't be drawn!


I was number 16, and there were a few times my breath caught in my throat as the county clerk pulled out a number from the bin and started reading, "Sixt.." (oh, crap, could I really handle sitting on a jury for as long as it takes?) "Sixty-five." Phew! Then again, "Sixt..."(Do I really think that I'm qualified to determine what justice is?) "Sixty-eight." Thank You, Lord! So number 16 was never called, and I will not have to report for jury duty again for another 6 years at least. Part of me was almost disappointed, because it would have been really interesting to experience an actual, real criminal trial (it was for grand larceny and possession of stolen property), as opposed to only the dramatized TV-versions. But part of me was also glad that I can go back to my normal life. Welcome to real life, Becca!

How can you not like maple syrup?

Yesterday, a bunch of us from the Athletic Department went out to the Maple Tree Inn for lunch. Mmm...all-you-can-eat buchwheat pancakes, with their own homemade maple syrup, and locally raised & cured sausage...But in the midst of this scrumptious feasting, Sandy decided to order a hamburger for her lunch. WHAT? Go to the Maple Tree Inn and eat a HAMBURGER? When I asked her why, if it was just because she wasn't in the mood for pancakes, she replied, "No, I just don't like maple syrup." WHAT? I don't get it.

Hoarse, but worth it...

This was probably the most jam-packed weekend of the semester so far! But also one of the best. On Friday, I left early from work to go with 15 of our youth to the our annual Youth Advance, at a ranch outside of Erie, PA. There were only 3 girls, but that made our interactions that much more fun, intense, and bonding, and created space for vulnerability that wouldn't have been there in a larger group. We went on a horseback trail ride, made it through their team-building low ropes course, shot archery, and learned how to throw tomahawks (!!!!!) - when I finally managed to embed one of them in the log target, I just about burst my buttons. I felt like Sully, on Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman! Well, except I don't think I have his deadly accuracy... :) But besides having fun, we also did a lot of talking, sharing, and learning, under our theme of "What on earth am I here for?" You should have seen how some of them responded! How is it that You are loved with an everlasting Love, and you were made to love and be loved can be so new and incredible and simple and revolutionary, and yet also so hard to live out? You'd think that, for some of them, it was the first time they had really heard that they were worth something - worth so much, in fact, that the perfect Son of God would die the most humiliating death in the world for them. And it was amazing to see how they started acting differently towards each other when they started realizing that, the same things that made them valuable, also made everyone else in the room valuable! The insults and teasing decreased, there was more generosity, more grace, more kindness...I hope it doesn't just stay at the ranch, but that we'll continue to see it manifest at youth group tonight!

So, thoroughly exhausted after that (although very content), I went to a 2-hour rehearsal for our Easter musical, then straight from there to the Casting Crowns/Nichole Nordeman/Josh Bates concert at St. Bonaventure's with Laura & Walter. WOW!!!! But it was all worth it. The concert was phenomenal, and all my exhaustion evaporated in the excitement of being in a packed-out gym on a (mostly) secular campus singing praises to the Almighty God, Maker and Sustainer of all things! It was so great that one of the first people on stage was one of the friars from their friary, welcoming everyone there in his brown robe, standing right next to the drumset and electric guitar. :)

Katrina and I always tease each other that all the music the other one likes sounds the same...for me, even though I like all sorts of music, there is one genre that I really love, which basically consists of a guy and his guitar. Hence, if you go through my music collection, you will find a very large selection of such music...(Jack Johnson, John Mayer, Chris Rice, Shane & Shane, Bebo Norman, to name a few)...which is why it made me so happy when for the opening act, Josh Bates walked onto the stage with an acoustic guitar and stood at the center stage mic, by himself, with his guitar. There he was, all curly-haired and 23 years old and singing songs that he had composed himself about life and God, and then when he pulled out his mandolin and started playing these ridiculous licks, I think I would've started drooling right then and there if the 6-year-old kid sitting behind me hadn't accidentally kicked me in the back...So I now join the ranks of those-who-have-small-crushes-on-people, along with Rachel Schumacher and Dave Steele...except I'm slightly more pathetic, 'cause I never actually MET Josh Bates. But he DOES know I exist!

You see, at intermission of the Casting Crowns part of the concert, Mark Hall (the lead singer) asked all the people who work in youth ministry to come to a room backstage to get some materials that they put out, and also to invite us to participate in the concert as prayer team/altar counselors. So I got a bag with response cards and pencils and stood in my aisle and gave the cards to people to fill out as they responded to the speaker, and prayed with them. But before this time came, the concert was still going on, but my friend Hilary and I couldn't get back to our seats, so we just hung out in the empty balcony right next to where we had met with Mark Hall, and watched the rest of the concert from there. We were right next to the stage, and so we got a great view of all the stuff going on behind the scenes, from all the people at the sound and video boards to the artists getting ready to go back onstage. (At one point, I was standing right next to the railing and Nichole Nordeman was 15 feet below me on the floor directly under us!) Well, at one point during the second half of the concert Josh Bates strapped on his mandolin and joined the band onstage for a few songs, and at this point in time Hil and I are singing along, with nobody else within about 50 feet of us, and when Josh turned towards us we waved, and he smiled. And for the whole rest of the time he was up there, he kept turning towards us and playing and singing at us. And only us. So, for at least 10 minutes, he knew I existed. And I'm pathetic, I know. Laugh at me! I laugh at myself! But, come on, you've got to admit that it's fun to entertain, even for a day, the thought of dating someone who is on a music tour across the country, to be able to pop in a CD and say, "Oh, by the way, this amazing music we're listening to? Yeah, I'm dating him..." *insert silly, impish grin here*

OK, OK, so all Jr. High-ness aside, even without Josh Bates, the weekend and the concert were phenomenal, smashing, and unforgettable! No words or pictures do it justice.

Time for a change of scenery...

I know! *gasp* It isn't GREEN? Ah, you thought that everything I owned was green, didn't you? Well, you are almost right. Except I decided to change things up...at least for a little while...maybe I'll start missing green so much I'll bring it back. Or maybe I'll fall in love with another colour and expand my colour palette, much to the delight of many of you. :)

An update on my weekend is coming soon...

St. Patrick's Day trivia...

Did you know that, this year, the Catholic Church officially made an exception to its Lenten Friday meat ban for St. Patrick's Day? Yep, that's right. Apparently, corned beef and other meaty delicacies are too important on this day to give up. That would be like asking them to give up beer for today! Absolutely inconceivable! So I guess Friday fish fry might be moved to Saturday this week... :)

I have never known the meaning of hunger. Or thirst. I wish there were some way to transport the abundant water from the spring in my backyard to these 3.7 million people who have none. If only it were that simple...

Send some rain, would You send some rain?
'Cause the earth is dry and needs to drink again
And the sun is high and we are sinking in the shade
Would You send a cloud, thunder long and loud?
Let the sky grow black and send some mercy down
Surely You can see that we are thirsty and afraid
But maybe not, not today
Maybe You'll provide in other ways
And if that's the case...

We'll give thanks to You with gratitude
For lessons learned in how to thirst for You
How to bless the very sun that warms our face
If You never send us rain

Daily bread, give us daily bread
Bless our bodies, keep our children fed
Fill our cups, then fill them up again tonight
Wrap us up
And warm us through
Tucked away beneath our sturdy roofs
Let us slumber safe from danger's view this time
Or maybe not, not today
Maybe You'll provide in other ways
And if that's the case...

We'll give thanks to You with gratitude
A lesson learned to hunger after You
That a starry sky offers a better view if no roof is overhead
And if we never taste that bread

Oh the differences that often are between
Everything we want and what we need

So grant us peace, Jesus, grant us peace
Move our hearts to hear a single beat
Between alibis and enemies tonight
Or maybe not, not today
Peace may be another world away
And if that's the case...

We'll give thanks to You with gratitude
For lessons learned in how to trust in You
That we are blessed beyond what we could ever dream
In abundance or in need
And if You never grant us peace

But Jesus, would You please...
(~Nichole Nordeman)

On my way to work today, I passed a Hummer on Route 19. I think that's the first time I've ever seen one of those completely unnecessary and superfluous vehicles in Allegany County. And it made me so mad! How is it that just the sight of one measly 4-wheeled vehicle can affect me so much? I almost wanted to "accidentally" hit it. (Except I don't think my Talullah would've done much damage...) Maybe I need some practice in patience.

raindrops keep falling on my head...

earlier today water was pouring down from the sky, and now it's drizzling outside, and if there were any doubts in your mind before about how i feel about rain, let it be known that i have definitively decided - i love rain! why do i love rain? well, let me tell you!

• the amazingly soothing sound it makes on the roof
• the way it beads up on the windows, and runs down the panes of glass in tiny rivulets
• the smell of rain...sigh...
• the smell after the rain
• the puddles, oh, the puddles!
• the soft, springy feeling of the ground when you go for a walk after it's rained
• standing outside in the rain, with my face turned up to the sky, eyes closed, letting it wash over me from head to toe
• the fact that it washes my car for me :)
• the way it makes everything greener
• lightning! so beautiful...
• the way thunder rattles the window panes
• the silence after a storm is done, and then the birds start chirping again
  
• i even love the worms that come crawling out onto the sidewalk when it rains...
  
• and when rain is coming down from the sky, it means it's warm! no freezing on its way through the atmosphere! :)
  

Wonderful find of the day:

http://stoneworkjournal.blogspot.com/ - An online literary/art journal published by Prof. John Leax, David Huth, and several Houghton Writing students. Wonderful. You should look into it sometime. I wish I could write like that...

Feliz Dia Internacional da Mulher!

Last year, on International Women's Day, I was talking to someone who was (half-jokingly) indignant about the fact that there's a Women's Day, but no Men's Day. At which point, said person (who happened to be a man) was not-so-gently reminded by every woman in the room that EVERY day of the year is Men's Day. For example, we celebrate national holidays on the birthdays of important people in our history, such as Presidents, and ALL of them are men! Since we haven't had any women as President, I guess I can't complain too much on that count... But we also have Martin Luther King, Jr. Day, to celebrate his contribution to the civil rights movement - so why don't we also have a day celebrating the contributions to the women's rights movement? I mean, would it be that unreasonable to have Elizabeth Cady Stanton Day, or Susan B. Anthony Day? :) (This is just me getting on my soapbox...hehehe...)

Anyways, for all you women out there, happy Women's Day! And for all you wonderful women in my life - Amy, Katrina, Rachel, Michelle, Tegan, Carina, Deanna, Cherith, Amy Rogers, Mom, Grandma, Laura, Karen, Aunt Cindy, Aunt Susan, Christine, Aunt Jodi, Jillian...and so many more - I am so thankful for you, so blessed by you! I am a better woman because of you. Here's to you!

A man is a great thing upon the earth, and through eternity--but
every jot of the greatness of man is unfolded out of woman,
First the man is shaped in the woman, he can then be shaped in
himself.

Walt Whitman :)

I just couldn't resist...

Most of you probably know that I need very little incentive to talk, or write, or even think, extensively on any issue. And for that reason, in response to Sam's comment on my last post, I will gladly offer more of my thoughts on Lent and sacrifice! :) Thanks, Sam, for your thoughts. And for your invitation to dialogue...be careful! You just might get what you asked for! (*grins*)

Part of me, like you, cringes at seeing Lenten vows become more like New Year's resolutions than sacrifices pleasing to a Holy God. I don't want this season to be my excuse to get rid of all the excesses I'm not motivated enough to get rid of during the rest of the year! That's like all the times I've arrived at church forgetting it's Communion Sunday, then upon seeing the bread & wine on the table at the front of the sanctuary, spending the first part of the service madly sorting through my heart in search for all the sins I may not have confessed so that I can partake without the weight of a guilty conscience. (And I have a feeling I'm not the only one who's ever done that before...) The "binging and purging" mentality so many people have of Christianity turns my stomach, and it makes me even more disgusted when I turn around the magnifying glass and see it in my own self. (And I'm afraid I see it in myself more often than I'd care to admit...) I don't want to use Christ's sacrifice as a salve for my guilty conscience - the Word did not become flesh in order to make me feel better about my life, but to draw all people to the Father, as a thief to steal the hearts of men and women and even children. To build a Kingdom on grace and love. To show us just how holy God created us to be, how devastatingly we all fall short, and then turn around and pave the way for us to be made holy through His own blood and His Spirit.

A love that is based on sacrifice is somewhat foreign to this world - or at least partly. We're OK when someone sacrifices out of love for us. But when we're called to sacrifice, that's quite another story! And yet when I think about sacrifice in the Christian life, I can't help but come up with two different kinds of sacrifice. One is the sacrifice of the "old self", the getting rid of things that are truly hindrances, the sifting and pulling and burning away the things that are unpleasing to God. This is a very necessary sacrifice, one we are called to make as followers of Christ! But this is not where it ends. We aren't only called to sacrifice the things we'd be glad to get rid of. We are also called to sacrifice good things - the best things, as you so well pointed out, things that we love and hold dear. This is the truest of all truths! The cost of discipleship is high, and it requires ALL of us, not just part; the surrendering of ALL things for the sake of gaining Christ. It involves being led where we may not want to go, as Jesus told Peter. And, for Lent, I think it is particularly significant that we give up something we enjoy.

Honestly, one of the main reasons I am giving up caffeinated beverages is because I enjoy them. A lot! I mean, I love chocolate, but I honestly don't eat it very often (maybe once a week, if I'm lucky), so it would feel kind of small to give up something I already mostly do without, anyways. Coffee, on the other hand, I drink every day, more than once. And while I have been realizing, now that I've stopped consuming caffeine, that I rely on it a lot more than I thought (as evidenced by my much-more-frequent yawning throughout the day...), I mostly just miss the taste of coffee, the feel of the warm mug in my hand while I'm answering the phone here at work, the comfortable part it has in my daily routine. Which is why I'm not even drinking decaf coffee during Lent. The awareness of my dependence on caffeine has certainly been eye-opening, and it is helping me learn what my limitations really are, (how much sleep I really need! hehehe...) but the primary purpose of my fast is not to get rid of something in my life that I see as being bad. It is because I live a fairly simple life, and there are very few things in which I take pleasure that are not crucial to my existence, my sanity, and my emotional/spiritual well-being at this point in time. I don't think that giving up any kind of food would be healthy for me right now, because I've been having a hard enough time eating healthily recently due to a lot of emotional stress. Other things I really enjoy? People - definitely can't give up people. :) Reading - I live alone, so if I gave up reading, I'd be stuck alone with my thoughts for far more time than I already do, and with where I'm at right now, that wouldn't be healthy, either. Music - I'd thought about it, but then again, I live alone, and music is one of the key ways in which I worship, in which I keep my focus on God instead of getting trapped in my own mind, thinking about things that would be best left alone. I gave up coffee so that, in missing something that I truly enjoy, which is part of my routine every day, I will have a reminder, whenever I crave it or miss it, that I need Christ in my routine that much more. And not just as another part of my routine, but permeating every single part of my routine. That, in the end, is the point of any sacrifice, I think - not the thing that is given up per se, but rather the space that is created in our hearts and lives for God to fill us more fully. Is that not what the Psalmist says? "'I have no need of a bull from your stall or of goats from your pens, for every animal of the forest is mine, and the cattle on a thousand hills'...You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it; you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise." He doesn't want the things that I give up for Him. He doesn't need those things. He wants the ME, the YOU, that can be more fully His when we give up those things. When we sacrifice the bad habits AND the good things, to create more room in our lives for Father, Son, and Holy Spirit to work and make us anew day by day.

Holy Spirit, come restore, renew! That is my Lenten prayer - only a magnification of what I long to be my prayer every day - "Lord, I lay all of me down as a sacrifice to You today. Take whatever pieces of me You need to take. Only give me Your love, Yourself, in return. Use me as You see fit." As Dan Holcomb put it so well, perhaps after a lifetime of Ash Wednesdays and Lenten seasons, that prayer will become ingrained in the whole of my life.

So there you have it, Sam - those are some of my thoughts, although I'm sure I could go on for a lot longer... :)

Are you giving anything up for Lent this year?

I didn't start doing it until I came to college, because I didn't really understand why it was important, what Lent was and what it meant to give something up for it. I thought of Easter mainly as a celebration, and didn't think too much about the church's 40-day season of penitence and mourning that comes before it. But I have been learning to love this season, the silence, the meditation, the reflection, the shedding rid of superfluous things to focus on Christ. As far as I can understand it, these are the main reasons why we sacrifice something or abstain from something for Lent:

as a discipline for learning self-control, to free our minds from the chase after material things,

as a reminder of Christ's sufferings and what our true pleasures are as followers of Christ,

as an act of sorrow over our sin.

Would you call me crazy if I told you that I even craved this season of denial? It is refreshing to be free. It is good to be reminded that there is a season for mourning. But that even in the midst of our mourning, we mourn as those who have hope, a sorrow that coexists with joy.

So, it is decided. I will give up coffee for Lent this year. And any sort of caffeinated beverage. (I say beverage because if I said ALL caffeine that would mean chocolate, too! I can do either/or, but not both at once...) So no more perpetual cup of coffee here on my desk next to my left hand. And no more Earl Grey tea after dinner as I curl up on the couch with a book...hmm...maybe I'll have to procure some decaf Earl Grey...But don't worry, I won't cheat and do decaf coffee, too. Coffee is completely out for the next 40 days. It will be a good reminder - whenever I reach for my coffee mug during the day and it isn't there, hopefully it will remind me to pray, to praise, to be mindful of my state and my need to reach for God, for Him to reach for me.

Now, just like in Christian discipleship it isn't enough just to be emptied of all sin, but to also be filled up with Christ's righteousness, the point of giving up something for Lent isn't necessarily the sacrifice. It's the change in us that happens when we sacrifice. It's the room that is freed up, when we pare down unnecessaries and simplify, to be filled with good things. Like prayer, reconciliation, service...So along those same lines, in addition to giving up caffeinated drinks, I'm also adding in regular exercise - 3x a week. That's right, baby! I'll go running this week for the first time this year! :)

So, are you giving anything up for Lent this year? Not that I'm trying to pressure you, or anything - I'm just curious about what kinds of things other people do. :)

So, speaking of procrastination, I think I got MAYbe half of the things on my list done this weekend...My house is what suffered the most neglect, with my kitchen and bedroom still appallingly messy...But, on the other hand, the housekeeping done in my heart was much more profitable! And probably much more needed, too...Conversation with friends and family, the fellowship of the Body, laughter, a solid sermon from Pastor Jon, an evening and afternoon playing with small children. I'm still chewing on a G.K. Chesterton quote that Pastor Jon mentioned:

The problem isn't that the Christian ideal has been tried and found wanting; it has been found difficult and left untried.

And I can't help but wonder - am I really trying it? Or am I playing it safe because that hurts less, requires less of me?

Procrastination...

So I've always been a procrastinator. All of you who knew me in college know this very well! Pushing the deadlines on papers, burning the candle at both ends to get everything done on time, camping out at the library during the last few weeks of school working on those big papers that we had all semester to work on...Well, in some ways, I guess I thought that after college my procrastination would go away, because I don't have papers and tests and deadlines any more. But for all of you procrastinators out there, you know that the opposite is, in fact, true - when there are no deadlines, procrastination gets WORSE! So I make deadlines for myself. And then, knowing that there are no consequences if I break my self-imposed deadlines, I push them back a little farther. Then I realize that I need to start giving myself consequences, or implementing a reward system, otherwise my motivation would be ZERO! For example, I tell myself, "Becca, you can't watch those new episodes of Gilmore Girls that just arrived from Netflix until you wash all the dishes in the sink and clean out Shelby's cage." The problem comes when I decide that I can get my reward now for doing the work later. For example, I could instead tell myself, "Becca, your reward for washing dishes and cleaning Shelby's cage is Gilmore Girls. But it's Friday night and you're tired, and you know that you're going to do those things tomorrow, so you can just watch Gilmore Girls tonight instead." Danger, Will Robinson! :) So the moral of the story is that it's harder than I thought to be self-motivated. But it feels so good when I actually do it right, in the right order, with the task first and the reward later! So that makes it all worth it. Except I'm still a procrastinator. For example, here is my list of...

Things to do this weekend:

1. Babysit for Jadyn Mucher tonight.
2. Bake bread tomorrow morning.
3. Finally finish and mail that letter to Rachel...that I started forever and a day ago...
4. Finally mail that card to Michelle...
5. Finally clean my room, that is currently submerged in piles of clothing (I don't think I've put anything in a drawer in 2 loads of laundry - it just goes from the clean laundry basket to my body to the dirty laundry basket, or the pile of I've-worn-this-once-but-it-doesn't-need-to-be-washed-yet pile. For all of you who don't have such a pile, you don't know what you're missing. It saves so much laundry-doing!) :)
6. Finally finish reading The Catcher in the Rye, which I had given up during my brief yearly foray back into the world of Narnia.
7. Finally go for a wintry walk near my house, to discover where all the snow-covered country roads actually lead.
8. Bake lots of goodies so that I have "planned-overs" in my fridge this week for Amy, Katrina, and myself to munch on.
9. Pray.
10. Replace the lightbulb in my other headlight, that is now burnt out like the other one was a few months ago, except this one isn't as easy to replace because the angles to get to it are all funny.
11. Work on what I'll be saying when I speak in youth group on Wednesday, about what drives your life.
12. Sleep...lots and lots of sleep... :)

Do you ever have one of those days when the urge to laugh and the urge to cry are equally strong? When you're not sure whether to run outside and dance a jig in the sunshine or to sit inside curled up under a blanket with a book? Whether to talk or just sit back and watch everyone else around you...whether to go to people or wait for them to come to you...whether to go out and change the world for Christ or to rest and allow myself to be changed by Him...whether to sit or stand or kneel or hug or shout or sing or lie down and fall into a very restful sleep? Well, today is one of those days for me. I bet it probably makes it very interesting for the people who work with me... :)

Thought for the day:

"Hope that is seen is no hope at all," Paul told the Romans. He mentions some of the good things that might come out of difficulties: "Suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope." He lists hope at the end, instead of where I would normally expect it, at the beginning, as the fuel that keeps a person going. No, hope emerges from the struggle, a byproduct of faithfulness.

As for faith, it will always mean believing in what cannot be proven, committing to that of which we can never be sure. A person who lives in faith must proceed on incomplete evidence, trusting in advance what will only make sense in reverse. As Dennis Covington has written, "Mystery is not the absence of meaning, but the presence of more meaning than we can comprehend."
~Philip Yancey, Reaching for the Invisible God

I think this may be the hardest part of faith, the blindness of it all. A blindness that comes not from emptiness, but from a fullness that is too full for me, a brightness that is too bright for these dim eyes to see except in very small doses, reflected and refracted and diffused. "Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain." And sometimes, when I ask God to reveal His plan to me, I realize that maybe I don't really want to know it all now. I don't think I could handle it. I might be like Sarah, and laugh, or like Moses, and claim inadequacy. Sometimes I wish things would make sense in advance. But then we wouldn't need faith. And everyone in their right mind would commit their lives to Christ, because there would be certainty in Him, clear-cut answers and paths and directions. It is so much harder to trust in advance what only makes sense in reverse. But here's the difference: the value is not only in the end, where the path is leading, but also in the process, in who we are becoming along the way. "The testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." If we knew ahead of time, we might walk a little straighter, stumble less, but would we really be becoming more like Christ? That task is infinitely harder. But infinitely better.

This is me today:

'Cause Amy & Katrina are getting back in 3 hours!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hip, hip, hooray!!!!!!!!

Life without electricity...

So today I realized what my life would be like without electricity, and the amount of stuff that I wouldn't be able to do was scary! I discovered this when I woke up late because the power had gone out and my alarm didn't go off...so, after much pondering about how much I rely on this amazing phenomenon of moving electrons, here are the things that can't happen in Becca's house/life when the power is out:

1) Waking up! No alarm clock, no wakey-wakey...
2) Showers! Water pump and water heater are both electric...so I'd be very dirty...
3) Eating! No refrigerator, no microwave, no stove...hmm...that leaves dry cereal and cold stuff out of cans and PB&J...
4) Staying warm! All my heat is electric baseboard heating. And I don't have a fireplace. So without electricity, I would freeze...
5) Driving anywhere! Not only does my car use electricity to start, I also can't get out of my garage without the electric garage door opener. At least I haven't figured out how to do it another way...
6) Entertainment! For the most part, I'm usually only at home when it's dark out. So there's only so much that one can do by oneself by candlelight to keep oneself busy...no wonder Laura Ingalls Wilder went to bed so early! :)

I don't realize how dependent I am on electricity for so many things in my life until I suddenly see what my life would be like without it. In the same way, I also can't help but think about how much more completely and utterly dependent I am on God. And sometimes I forget. Sometimes it takes a time when I see what my life would really look like without Him to appreciate and fully grasp how much He sustains me, how much I need Him! "I need Thee every hour, most gracious Lord..."

For all you linguists and culturally-interested people...

My mom sent me this one, and I just about fell out of my chair I was laughing so hard! Maybe it's only funny for people who speak Portuguese, or who have been to the Northeast of Brazil (the Brazilian equivalent of "the South"), or who have ever been in places where people try to spell out English words the way they sound to them, but I couldn't resist...

VOCÊ SABE O QUE É TAPOÉ ????? ("Do you know what a tapoé is?" - pronounced as 3 syllables, with the emphasis on the third and the "t" at the beginning sounding more like a soft "d." In Portuguese, it sounds kinda like the name of an animal, or an exotic tropical fruit, or maybe like it could be some character from folklore like the Saci-Pererê, a one-legged black man who lives in a whirlwind.)
ALGUM DIA VOCÊ JÁ VIU UM TAPOÉ???? ("Have you ever seen a tapoé?")
OU SERÁ QUE SUA MÃE SEMPRE ESCONDEU O TAPOÉ DE VOCÊ???? ("Or has your mom always hidden the tapoé from you?")

SEGUE A FOTO DE UM LEGÍTIMO TAPOÉ. ("Here is a picture of an authentic tapoé.")


Get it? It's Tupperware!!!!!!!!! Hahahahahahaha......

Fine, roll your eyes. I think it's hilarious. You only wish you spoke Portuguese like me...

Have you ever had one of those days when everything seems to go by in slow motion? Well, today was one of those days. I woke up feeling like I'd been hit by a Mack truck - body aches, fever, sore throat, sinus pressure, the whole shabang...So I called in sick and tried to go back to sleep, but I just tossed and turned. Finally, I decided it was useless to try anymore, and I got up, showered, took some Day Quil, and trucked off to work. I feel like I've been blundering around in a hazy daze, taking longer than usual to do everything, having to have everyone repeat things to me because I forget them...And I really miss being able to breathe through my nose...

Have you ever stopped to think about how amazing it is that our bodies work the way they do? For example, all the sugar and protein and hormone levels in my blood are kept in balance by an amazingly complex system that takes whole textbooks to explain. And, if that system stopped working properly for some reason, it would take a whole medical team on 24-7 rotations, with meds and needles and machines, to make up for it. Like Karis, who has ports and catheters and lines jabbed into her body in 12 different places to handle all of it:
This week, she just started being able to eat again! WOOHOO!!! Orange popsicles and chocolate pudding and ice cream. :) Man, I would miss food...salad, rice and beans, chicken parmesan, extra sharp cheddar cheese...

Right now, if I want to pop on over to the Proctor Station just down the hall for something to munch on, all I have to do is stand up and walk my little body over there. It just takes a few seconds. This is what it takes for Karis to go for a spin down the hall (no food involved):

It takes about an hour just to get her transferred over to the wheel chair!

How blessed I am indeed. And so very little of it has to do with me. Lord, how can I ever be grateful enough for the depths of Your grace?

For once, I wish I had TV channels...Usually, the thought of most television shows just makes me cringe, and I don't want my life to revolve around what my Grandma so fondly refers to as "the boob tube." But for this week, I'd gladly give up all my scrupulous arguments about TV to be able to watch the Olympics. Specifically the figure skating. :) Looking at the pictures online afterwards just doesn't cut it...sigh...anyone want to record them for me?????? I would love you forever! I was trying to figure out whether Netflix would put DVD's of the Olympics in my queue if I asked them to...right above the Godfather...but, somehow, I don't think they'd do it. Bummer!

Food for thought...

From the pen of Nick Spencer, from the London Institute for Contemporary Christianity:

Art should illuminate. And cartoons, as valid an art form as any other, should help us to see ourselves and our world more clearly, exposing faults, parading idiosyncrasies, mocking pretensions.

Regrettably, our response to such illuminations often sheds more light than the illustrations themselves. Such is the case with the reaction to the satirical images of the prophet Muhammad published in various European newspapers over recent months.

It has shown, among other things, how there exists a silent hierarchy of religious sensitivity in Britain. Christian offence at Jerry Springer – The Opera or Gilbert and George’s Sonofagod exhibition (to name but two) is clearly not as important as the potential Muslim reaction to a cartoon of Muhammad.

It has shown how, for some Muslims in the UK, an insult to Islam greatly outweighs the moral and legal framework in which they live, justifying open incitement to violence and murder.

And it has shown how wide is the gap that separates what we might loosely call the religious mentality of the ‘Rest’, which believes that some things should remain beyond ridicule, and the secular one of the ‘West’ that claims that nothing is.

Different as these three matters are, they all point towards one key question: what (if anything) is of ultimate value to us? What (if anything) is sacred?

Our answer to this question will dictate those to the many others that cluster around it: Is there a limit to artistic freedom? Does freedom necessarily involve the freedom to offend? Is religious or national identity more important? Is anything beyond ridicule?

A very good point, Mr. Spencer. Is it unreasonable to expect all use of freedom to also be tempered by respect? Is it my right to infringe on other people's rights?

A week of surprises!

Surprise #1: I finally got to meet my dairy farmer neighbours. When I had to trudge over there and ask for help pushing my car out of the snow bank off the end of my driveway on Tuesday morning on my way to work. :) His name is Dan Smith, and he's a downright pleasant guy, not to mention wonderfully helpful when one's car is stuck in the snow. When I introduced myself, he said, "Oh, I have a daughter named Becca!" Maybe I'll just have to invite their family over for dinner sometime, as a thank you, and so I can meet his daughter Becca. :)

Surprise #2: When I got home from work on Tuesday, already sore from digging and pushing my car out of the snow earlier, I wasn't looking forward to having to shovel the other foot of snow off my driveway that accumulated while I was at work. But then I got home to a CLEAR DRIVEWAY! Someone with a generous heart and a plow on the front of their truck had removed all the snow from my long driveway. HOORAY!!! :)

Surprise #3: Yesterday, I got a surprise visit in my office from my Aunt Paula and Uncle Steve, who moved to Florida not too long ago! They used to live in Andover, about 45 minutes away from Houghton (just south of Wellsville), and they were on their way back through here in the North for visits, doctor's appointments, and a little bit of business, so they decided to stop by and see me at work while they were in the neighborhood. What a wonderful surprise! To catch up with people who you love but haven't seen in a long time. :)

Surprise #4: My cousin Alyson (Uncle Steve & Aunt Paula's daughter) and her husband Jon are pregnant with kid #4! Let's just say it was a surprise. :)

Surprise #5: (Well, this one isn't really a surprise. It's a given. But it makes all these surprises possible, along with all the other amazing things that go on around us every day that we take for granted but are, in fact, truly miracles of God's grace.) God is awesome! And wonderful, and immeasurable, and beautiful, and gracious, and compassionate, and loving, and...humble enough to shrink Himself down into a size that we can see and feel, through the world and people around us, so that we can know His love for us even though it surpasses knowledge, and so that we can love Him back.

Interesting in Exodus...

So, our church is reading through the Bible in one year together this year, and even though I've read through it many, many times before, it never ceases to amaze me how many things I stumble across that I've somehow never noticed before! Do you ever do that?

This week's musings and delvings were kicked off by something Pastor Jon mentioned in his sermon on Sunday, about the ways in which God works to bring His people freedom. Jumping off from the plagues, he talked about how His deliverance often comes in stages, not all at once, and His plan is mysterious and even confusing until it is fully completed. And he used as an example the crossing of the Red Sea, in which Moses prays and raises his staff as the Egyptians close in on them, and...the wind blows? That's God's deliverance? Exodus 14: 21 says that the wind blew all that night. Maybe it's because I've seen Cecil B. DeMille's Ten Commandments too many times, but I'd always pictured the parting of the sea as a pretty instantaneous occurrence. Moses raises his staff and prays, and BAM! there is a dry path through the sea. But it wasn't like that. It took the wind blowing all night. And even with the pillar of fire between them and the Egyptians, that must have been a pretty confusing, frightening, and sleepless night for the Israelites, wondering what the heck kind of help wind was going to be against Pharaoh's chariots! It was still miraculous, mind you, but I'm sure the people must have been thinking, "Hurry up, already!" as they waited on pins and needles with the Egyptians breathing down their necks. And yet when morning came, that long night of waiting became clearly worth it, as there was singing and dancing and worship for the Lord who works deliverance through blowing wind.

So, still thinking about the often slow and mysterious ways in which God works, I came across that same theme later in Exodus, as God is addressing His people from Mount Sinai. After giving them the Ten Commandments, telling them how to live in love and justice with each other, teaching them about the festivals they are to keep, He promises to drive out the Hittites, Canaanites, Perizzites, Jebusites, Amorites, and Hivites from the land that will be theirs. But then He adds, "But I will not do this all in one year because the land would become a wilderness, and the wild animals would become too many to control. I will drive them out a little at a time until your population has increased enough to fill the land." Hmmm...not exactly what they were expecting, I'd imagine. In other words, "I will work My promises slowly, so that you can keep up, so that when the time comes for the fullness of My work, you will be have grown enough to handle it." Wow. I had honestly never caught that before. Yet another reminder that His ways are higher than mine, that things will come about in His time regardless of how much I fret. "Be still, my child! You can trust me!"

Thank you, Rachel!!!!

Today, I just got a new book in the mail, at the suggestion of my wonderful friend Rachel, who is beautiful, and whose heart is even more beautiful: Between Heaven and Earth. Yes, I'm in the middle of my workday, but when a package comes in the mail run with my name on it, and I KNOW that it's the book I just ordered, it's hard not to rip it open and take a peek right away anyways. It's a compilation of prayers and people's musings about prayer, and even in my random flipping through its pages, it has already blessed my socks off! Here's a tidbit:

Why do we pray?

For reassurance, sometimes, because it's an uncertain world and each of us needs our spirit bolstered from time to time. For guidance, sometimes, because it's an uncharted way we travel, and we need all the direction we can get. For help, other times, because the way is long and almost always uphill and sometimes perilous.

We pray for our daily bread and our yearly physical. We pray when we wake up in the morning and when we go to bed at night. We pray when we're confused. Or lonely. Or sad. We pray when we're happy, too. And when we're grateful. Grateful for seeing a hummingbird up close or a double-rainbow off in the distance. Grateful for a good friend who was there when we needed someone to listen...or there when we needed someone to speak. We pray for reasons as slight as a sudden feeling of appreciation for a cloud that shades us from the sun to one as serious as a lingering sense of abandonment in the face of some personal tragedy.

Partly, though, at least, we pray to find the part of us that is missing. Like the missing piece of a jigsaw puzzle that draws attention to itself by its absence. Like the empty space on a wall that calls out to be filled with a picture or a piece of furniture. Like the bare spot in a lawn that yearns for grass. Prayer is a cry from the bare spot in our lives, from the empty space, from the part of us that is missing. It is the wounded part seeking to be healed, the missing part seeking to be found, the now-dry clay of the sculpture seeking the hands that first touched it, first caressed it, first loved it.

Somehow, I think that's exactly why I pray. And it seems to make "praying without ceasing" a little less daunting of a task. :) Thanks for the book suggestion, Rach!

So, the Superbowl is coming up this weekend,
and I just have one question for you, a question that I have been asking for a loooooong time:

Why do they call it football?

I mean, the ball is actually in contact with someone's foot for maybe 1% of the game. Which makes it only slightly more of a foot sport than basketball, in which the only involvement the feet have is running around. The hands have more involvement in soccer (the real "football") than the feet do in American football, even if you don't count the goalie, because of how many throw-ins there are in a game. Who comes up with these silly ideas, anyways?

Every week at youth group, I have a blast. We play amazingly fun games, and sometimes I can't believe how few of the kids already knew them. For example, last night we played Fruit Basket Upset (which Pastor Don re-named Demolition Fruit Basket to add the full-contact element...), and only about 5 of the 30-something teenagers there had ever heard of it before! Can you believe it? (If YOU don't know how to play Fruit Basket, MY mouth is gaping at you right now, like a fish, in disbelief and shock.) We also played a modified version of Speed Scrabble/Take Two - my favourite game of ALL TIME - except with giant Scrabble letters, making a crossword puzzle on the floor, and whenever a team yelled out "Take one!" they had to send someone running across the room to get a letter out of the pile. TONS of fun. Except for when they started getting frustrated that they couldn't think of words to use - I guess that's what I take for granted from having grown up in a home where reading and talking and playing games gave me a HUGE vocabulary. Among many other things.

But every week at youth group, my heart also breaks. It breaks because so many of these kids don't have so many of those things that I have taken for granted. Like 2 parents who love each other, who desire to know and love and follow God, who love me and want me to live in Christ. (Not to mention siblings and grandparents and aunts, uncles, and cousins who do, too.) Like encouragement from friends and teachers to do well in school and in life. Like food to eat every day, and no shortage of clothes to wear (and that I LIKE to wear), and having no relatives in jail, and a million other things. And when the kids in youth group drive me crazy with their antics, it helps to remember that a lot of the reason for their behaviour is that it's a cover-up for all the ways in which they feel exposed and helpless and vulnerable and shafted and hurt. So many of the kids I work with every week don't have the things I used to take for granted. Some of them are so starved for attention that they would rather act out and get reprimanded than risk being a wallflower, being ignored. Some of them have families that don't care a snit about what they do with their lives, and others have families that are working so hard to make ends meet that they don't have any time left to be involved in their kids' lives at all. It reminds me every week of how much I have to be grateful for, how little of it has to do with any merit or effort of mine, and how much I am called to share the blessings that have been so lavishly bestowed upon me.